Shreya’s monthly column for newspapers in October is about modern love and where to find it

“…It was unfortunate, therefore, that on the one night recently that some couples-time was scrounged, the only cinema show we found to watch was The Materialists. Whilst this isn’t a review, because I won’t add to the glut, I feel obligated to warn my readers to stay away from this snoozefest, rendered more ridiculous by its somnambulating lead, Dakota Johnson.

But its premise isn’t as pointless — that modern men and women are kept apart by the demands they make of their dates. Not the occasion as with Hubby and I — entertaining would have sufficed — but the person they hope to engage. What essential qualities must peeps possess to interest the partner-seekers of this age?”

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Shreya’s monthly column for newspapers in September is about the winds of change and fanning them ourselves

“But the battle isn’t irredeemably lost. If spearheading isn’t your gig, there are still people worth supporting, from climate activist Greta Thunberg to New York mayoral candidate Zohran Mamdani, to grassroots leaders of progressive, sustainable living across this distressed planet. Liking them as people shouldn’t be prerequisites, as it’s their urgent causes we need to rally around…”

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Shreya’s year-end wrap-up column for newspapers in 2024 is a satirical look at alternative awards for the powerful

“Awards more fitting, I promise you, than the outrageous annual payments they gift themselves (do I smell a Muskrat or is that $56bn in ill-gotten gains?), or the made-much-of awards that are handed out like party favours amongst the One Per Cent. These poor little rich prats might have cornered the world’s resources, but have they got what they truly deserve? NO, but I’m not that bitch Karma, sadly, so I can’t deliver just desserts.

Yet, ask yourself, what do you give someone who has EVERYTHING? Here are six prizes so perfect for avaricious fat cats and ruthless despots that they’ve never even considered them…”

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Shreya’s column for newspapers in October is about cold-shouldering the ‘wellness’ gurus as we find our own methods of managing in tough times

(Photo by Olivia Rose Barns for Nottingham UNESCO City of Literature and Nottingham Trent University)

“…chill out we must. Make the best of a bad job. Get our heads down and plough on. That I can do, and have always done, but this unwinding malarkey — how on this storm-tossed earth does one do that? Should I phone a friend? Ask the audience? Can Pink Floyd help me get comfortably numb?

My bestie said looking forward to his retirement sustained him. But the average age of retirement in most countries has been pushed to seventy, which seems too distant a prize to even contemplate! Gone are the days, even in prosperous western states, when you could retire in your fifties with a pension that kept you in clover for the rest of your life. A subject so triggering for France this year, that a million would-be-pensioners fought over it with the gendarmes, up and down the Champs Elysees!

How about a ‘mini-retirement’ Gary-Neville-style? We cackled when this millionaire footballer waxed lyrical about his ‘new’ idea; a centuries-old concept everyday folk call a holiday! He might be better acquainted with it in practice, however, as we plebs could do with a proper break. The average American, often working two jobs, gets ten paid annual holidays, whilst the rest of us, marginally better off, are too beset with health, financial, parental, and other problems to relax.”

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